As most probably already know, my father passed away on the 4th of this month. He died from the cancer I mentioned a few posts back, called Pleural Mesothelioma. I know that he is now free from all pain and worldly cares and sorrows, totally happy and made perfectly blessed in the full enjoying of God to all eternity. Many times I have seen God's mercies at work now more than ever and I know that this was the best for all of us, especially Dad who was bearing so much pain every day. It was becoming harder to talk to him because his voice was failing and the only question that would come to mind is "how are you?" but none of us wanted to remind him of how he felt or to make him repeat himself when we didn't understand. God is so merciful that he didn't have to endure this for years; sometimes the selfish side of me wishes he had..but I know in reality that we never wanted that. It's really hard to find the right words, so forgive me if I don't come across clearly. Despite whatever the expectations were, there was no knowing the number of days left, so when Mom called on Tuesday it still hit with a shock (to say the least) for all of us. Even after two weeks of realizing he's gone it still seems surreal, you realize it in a factual kind of way, but until you apply it to a memory or a new hole in your life it doesn't feel like this is reality. In that way memories are both joy and sadness, it only takes one memory to venture back into tears, but I am so happy to have all of my memories of times with Dad: steam rolling, spinning his belt buckle on his lap, cutting our pancakes, telling us to "rise and shine little pumpkin heads", even cold porridge has meaning to it. There's no one to call me "Jody-babe" anymore... I miss that one too. My dad had many gifts.. a strong love for God, a great sense of humor, a ready ability to teach, a variety quirks, and many practical skills which included training us in the way we should go. :) Haha, when we were little he made this spanking board..and with a marker wrote soft on one side and hard on the other, and inscribed it with verses from the proverbs, so that whenever we did something wrong we'd cry "the soft side daddy, the soft side!!". Funny, even that becomes more of a fond memory.

Well the laundry calls and I must answer, catch ya later.

Jode


Phi 1:20 According to my earnest expectation and my hope, that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life, or by death. 21 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. 22 But if I live in the flesh, this is the fruit of my labour: yet what I shall choose I wot not. 23 For I am in a strait betwixt two, having a desire to depart, and to be with Christ; which is far better:

PS If you'd like to see more childhood photos of Dad and his siblings I have them up on yahoo here and sorry they're not really in any type of order yet. :)


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